Sunday, March 9, 2008

FFFRRREEEEEEEDDOOOOOOOMMMMMM!!!

Ding Dong. The bug is gone.
The wicked bug?  The wicked bug.
Ding Dong the wicked bug is gone.
Wake up - sleep head, get your shoes, get out of bed.
Run out, the wicked bug is gone!! *
My apologies to the Wizard of Oz and all the Munchkins.

I don't know what happened.  One moment it was there.  Three inches from my door. The next it was gone. Damn good thing because the MO has threatened to have a restraining order issued if I called one more time. Personally, I think if I spend what amounts to a small house payment in rent, then I should get the same service I would if I had a house (and a husband i.e. live in maintenance).  'Cause darn-tooting I would have hauled significant other's rear end off the couch and to the front door to remove that HUGE BUG.

I don't know where IT went but if I had to spend one more day held captive by a reject from a Men In Black casting call, I was going to go bonkers.  The maintenance here really sucks.  I can get my leaky faucet fixed in ten minutes, but having my only escape route cleared of all possible man-eating-menaces.... Yeah, someone needs to get their priorities straight here people and I am guessing it ain't me.  

Only now I am afraid IT wasn't dead, but IT has just relocated and is sitting there waiting for me to walk outside my door so it can attack.  I mean, I never actually saw IT die, did I?  And it's not like I was going to crawl out the door, grab one of IT's legs and take a pulse to determine actual death.  (OHHH... moment for creepiness to pass.....) I did mention that large imagination I have when it comes to bugs, right?  What if IT had called in re-enforcements and they are waiting for me in the stairwell? Was I wise to use the entire can of Raid when I first saw IT?  Should I have saved a bit for my gauntlet run to freedom?  Crap, now I am stuck.  

10 comments:

Anonymous said...

You are cracking me up with this bug story!

Unknown said...

You have more imagination in your keyboard than most have in their whole hard-drive!!!

MJenks said...

You could also look at it this way: Some scavenging bird might have come along and eaten it. Birds eat bugs.

Of course, now you can fear the unseen diseases brought on by birds. Or, every time you step outside your door, you can think of that scene at the end of the classic "The Birds" where they're all gathered around the house, watching and waiting.

Anonymous said...

I think you need an exterminator!

Lisa-tastrophies said...

OHHH the birds.... I had forgotten about them.... Well, there's another day shot to hell by my over active imagination that is going to go all nuts thinking about being attacked by rabid-bug-eating-man-stalking-birds! :-)

MJenks said...

If it helps, I don't think birds can get rabies.

Small solace, I'm sure.

Trish Ryan said...

When you don't have Raid, hairspray works...

Anonymous said...

That bug was d-e-a-d darlin'! Me thinks you just need an excuse to stay home and blog and play make new friends at TSB. ;-)

Unknown said...

OK, is the "FREEDOM" from Braveheart too!! Just thought you might me carrying the movie quotes up from your last blog!

Lisa-tastrophies said...

Yes, the Freedom was from Braveheart :-)